Just a few minutes ago, I coined a new phrase that I think might catch on quite big. It is...
Nuptial Terrorism - 'n&p-sh&l 'ter-&r-"i-z&m - noun - the act of inflicting pain and sufferring, whether mental or physical, on one spouse by the other. May be done out of spite or hatred or, in some twisted instances, as a term of endearment.
I came up with this phrase while Katie was curled up on my lap on the couch in our living room. We had the movie Stealing Home on in the background (one of our personal faves) and we were talking, cuddling, etc.
Then she started to pinch me. No, no, no. You don't do that and not expect some kind of retaliatory attack. Hey, what goes around comes around, right?
So I coined this phrase and informed her that it had been immediately committed to the law register and is punishable by tickling.
I really don't think she appreciated the efficiency of our legal system in judging on this matter. In fact, she cursed and swore as I tickled her sides.
Bear in mind, this phrase can be applied to either member of a relationship. Man v Woman, Woman v Man, Man v Man, Woman v Woman, etc. (hopefully, you do not fall into an "et cetera" category).
Feel free to employ this legal precedent the next time you are the victim of nuptial terrorism. Should you need more reference material, contact the law offices of Kapgar.com, Esq. We will be more than happy to provide you with the necessary documentation of this new legal measure.
You do not need to be afraid to report instances of nuptial terrorism. In fact, hiding these despicable acts will only make matters worse as those who commit N.T. once are likely to do it again and again until they are stopped.
Do not allow yourself to become a victim of nuptial terrorism.
