Goodbye my friend...

My dear friend,

Why has our friendship failed? I feel as though our relationship was never quite given the chance it so richly deserved.

Was it something I said? Was it something I did (or did not do)?

I've tried to be a good friend. I talk about you on occasion. I visit. Even when I'm exceptionally busy, I will check in to make sure things are kosher with you.

Yet you spite me so.

Regardless of the efforts I have made to allow our friendship to bloom, you make absolutely no move whatsoever to take "us" to the next level. You seem more than happy to just sit there and do nothing; content in my actions, but never reciprocating.

I don't get it.

But I don't want it to end. Clearly, I feel more indebted to our friendship than you.

Some might call it codependency, others obsession. Me? I prefer to use a Web acronym to describe it... BFF... yes, "Best Friend Forever." That's what you mean to me. And that's what I thought I meant to you.

Is it because I am just one man? A lone soul in a sea of millions striving to be your pal?

I know you are well loved. You have many, many friends. But none of them would ever treat you the way that I would if you'd just give me a chance.

Those other 101,872,606 "friends" you have? They don't care about you the way I do. They're nobodies. Just faces trying to be cool by association.

Tom, why am I not your friend? Please explain this to me and help me reconcile my feelings.

Still your BFF,

Heartbroken in Chicagoland

I've got a meme for you in the extended post, courtesy of C(h)ristine.

Checklist Meme
Just bold the things you have accomplished in your life.

1. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
2. Swam with wild dolphins
3. Climbed a mountain (a small one)
4. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
5. Been inside the Great Pyramid
6. Held a tarantula
7. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
8. Said "I love you" and meant it
9. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby's diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was shit faced
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched wild whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Posed nude in front of strangers
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River - or was it the Colorado River?
    
82. Been on television news programs as an expert
83. Got flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas - next June
    
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Eaten fugu (pufferfish)
89. Had a one-night stand
90. Gone to Thailand
91. Bought a house
92. Been in a combat zone
93. Buried one/both of your parents
94. Been on a cruise ship
95. Spoken more than one language fluently - not quite, but close
    
96. Performed in Rocky Horror Picture Show
    
97. Raised children
98. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn't stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn't have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication - does my blog count?
     
106. Lost over 100 pounds - if you count all the times I lost weight, it totals well over 100 pounds, but there were weight gains in between
     
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane - would an R.C. count? Nah, I didn't think so
     
109. Petted a stingray
110. Broken someone's heart
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a T.V. game show - as a kid for naming all Santa's reindeer
113. Broken a bone
     
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced - not for decorative purposes and not intentionally, either
     
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol - all of the above
     
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Had major surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon - been there and hiked, but not to the bottom
     
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours - it's called college
     
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about - I've converted three people to Mac users
     
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Petted a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad and The Odyssey - just The Odyssey
     
135. Selected one important author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions - so far, so good
     
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair - it was actually my mom's booth at a craft fair, but I was working it with her
     
146. Dyed your hair - tried to, but it didn't work
     
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident - it was just me, though
     
150. Saved someone's life - this can be argued as the car wreck I was in was what caused my dad to finally start wearing his seatbelt every day; think of it as preventative lifesaving
     

What have you done?

92.5 out of 150 isn't so bad. But there are so many more on this list I want to do.