When you're a first-time parent, and I'm sure all former first-time parents will agree, the worst feeling in the world is that of utter helplessness.
I'm feeling that right now.
His cough worsened a bit. Early last week, the pediatrician diagnosed him with an upper respiratory infection... or, in his case, a wet cough in his trachea area that was not in his lungs. The ped told us to simply aspirate his nose with that squeezy bulb thingie and give him saline spritzes as needed.
Katie took him back on Friday and it had moved into his lower respiratory system and was diagnosed as something called "bronchulitis," which is basically an infant form of bronchitis. The doc has added the use of a nebulizer to our routine to hopefully clear him up. He hates the thing passionately. Cries the entire five to seven minutes we have to use it on him so we've taken to using it while he sleeps.
For the most part, Nathan is great. He eats, he's well hydrated, he poops, he pees, he sleeps, he plays. He's a normal baby. But when that cough comes, I feel absolutely horrible for him. It starts off normal enough but digresses into this deep tummy hack where he seemingly loses control over his body and, in some extreme cases, vomits up everything he recently ate all over himself, the carpet, and Katie and I (Katie has been his target four times and I've been hit three times).
And all I can do is try and comfort him. I hold him close and rub his back or belly. I kiss his forehead or cheek or both. I talk calmly and slowly to him in hopes it will make him less stressed out and end the hacking session.
It just feels terrible that this is all either of us can do. Nathan just looks at us with tear-filled eyes and a red face looking like he's begging us to make it stop. And we can't.
Please, God, just make the coughing stop. Let him be his normal, bright, happy, playful self.
Now that I've got Nathan's cough temporarily abated and he's up in bed for a nap, I'm online checking my work email, blogging, getting terrified by Google searches for "bronchulitis," and watching a lot of SyFy Channel.
Right now, it's the final hour of Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home. As cheesy as the film is, I've always loved it. And, I swear, watching one of the original cast movies convinces me that J.J. Abrams and his casting director could not have possibly done a better job of casting the rebooted franchise in 2009. Impeccable job!
Next up are Star Trek: First Contact and Star Trek: Nemesis. Since I was never a watcher of the Next Generation cast, I never saw any of their movies either. This should be an interesting experiment. I'm not sure if I'll watch both. I somehow doubt I'll be able to as I'm sure Nathan will wake up in the middle of it. But if I like what I do see of one, I'll look to rent or stream them in their entirety.
I remember seeing some heavy promotion of this new show during SyFy's 20th anniversary special a few weeks ago. I wish I could remember more about it, but all I can really say is that the cable guide describes it as "City Protective Services officer Kiera Cameron is transported from 2077 to deal with eight of the world's deadliest terrorists." Sounds cool. Plus it stars Rachel Nichols (Criminal Minds, G.I. Joe), an actress I keep hoping will have her big breakthrough. Maybe this will finally be it. Who knows?