Just roll with it, baby...
Tuesday, 20 December 2005
I find it hard to believe that it was four years ago this month that the world was introduced to the Segway Human Transporter.
Remember that thing?
It was the two-wheeled, gyropscopically equilibriated, personal transportation device marketed to just about anybody that was sick of using their two legs to get from point A to point B. Just lean forward to move forward and, well, you get the point.
This thing was supposed to revolutionize personal transportation.
Move over skateboard. Outta the way, bicycle. Rollerblades? Bah!
The goal of the Segway company was to have sold 50,000 SHTs within the first year of business. Their hope was to see their creation employed by commuters, shoppers, policemen, etc., the world over.
And, how has Segway done in its quest?
Well, about 6,000 units were sold in the first 21 months of business.
What happened to the Segway? I feel like VH-1 should run a Where Are They Now? special.
I don't know about you, but I have seen only one Segway HT in my entire life out in the wilds. It was being used by a cop in Chicago on Black Friday 2005. And how he managed to maneuver that thing through the throngs of frantic shoppers is beyond me entirely.
Aside from that, I've seen it on some TV shows here and there, most notably, Arrested Development where it is used more to emphasize the pathetic, overindulgent nature of its primary rider, GOB (Will Arnett), than as a form of product placement.
Don't get me wrong, the Segway company is still alive, though not necessarily well. They still make the SHT (no jokes about what the initials almost spell, okay?).
But, you've gotta wonder what has happened to the Segway HTs that have sold over the years. Where are they being used? How are they being used? Are they being used at all?
I'm here to tell you that, yes, Segway HTs are playing an important part in American society. Their utilitarian nature has finally found its niche market. And I think Segway will be able to bank upon this new group of SHT enthusiasts...
The Bay Area Segway Enthusiasts and their love of Segway Polo!
Yep, polo played on Segways. When I read this article on Digg.com this morning, I couldn't help but laugh. They even have a video posted on Google Video. Has anyone actually ever seen this being played? I would love to hear what you have to say about it.
I gotta give them props for creative uses for a rather expensive technology. But, somehow, I just don't see this catching on too big. At $4,000-5,000 per SHT, I think I'd be a bit afraid to use it for a mallot match.
P.S. To all of you actual Segway HT enthusiasts, I apologize if you are offended by the condescending nature of this post. I just find Segway Polo to be one of the funniest things I've seen in a while.
P.P.S. To all of you Segway HT enthusiasts, I apologize if you find my humorous views on Segway Polo to be anything but funny especially if you really do take the game seriously. Heck, I play disc golf and I'm sure some people can't find it in themselves to take that seriously either. But, you know, one actually has a national organization and tournaments with cash prizes and sponsorships and I'm not going to say which one it is.
P.P.P.S. Okay, so my apology was less than sincere. Yeah, I can be a sarcastic sumbitch, can't I? But, c'mon! Look at what I'm working with here...
I'm going to shut up before I find myself being chased down the street by a torch- and pitchfork-wielding mob of vindictive Segites.