"Moron!" "Dickhead!" You know that they're yelling that to each other again. Almost exactly one year to the day after his best friend and acting partner Walter Matthau died (July 1, 2000), actor Jack Lemmon has died from complications related to cancer. He was 76 years old. I'm not happy about this because I like Lemmon a lot. He's an incredible actor with the ability to pull off almost any role. Well, he's back together again with Matthau and you know these Grumpy Old Men are just raising hell up in heaven. God bless you, Jack, and thanks.

Yesterday turned out nicely. Katie came down and surprised me last night. Really nice, indeed. We watched a movie, went for a walk/jog, and just talked and hung out. I liked it a lot.

And to add to the "Dipshits 'R' Us" file... the government and citizenry of the state of North Dakota have been trying to find a way to change how the rest of the U.S. perceives them and maybe up the tourism in their great state. One suggestion was to rename the state simply "Dakota". South Dakota can keep their adjective, but North is too good for it. They claim "North" makes people envision the state as cold and barren. Well, you know something... now that I think about it... Dakota just sounds way too nice... maybe I'll go there now... sounds like a wonderful place... I'm getting an urge... oh, wait, urge just passed. C'mon people, get a life. I think there's a little more to the perception of North Dakota as cold and barren then just the name. Could it be because it is cold and barren... not to mention "boring," "desolate" and "a potty stop on the way to Montana"? Jeez. Okay, perhaps I'm being a bit judgmental, but when you consider the fact that I'd rather visit Alaska than North Dakota and the descriptions that I've received of the state from people who have either lived or visited there, well...

Good news, the Mac in my office has been resurrected. As many of you who follow this page regularly should know, this computer (that I'm currently typing this page on) has been a regular piece of garbage. Nothing would work. I'd lost access to my external harddrive and a bunch of other problems. Well, a guy here at work completely wiped out my harddrive and rebuilt it from scratch. Now it works pretty well. Only two problems, we still can't access the external hard drive (we lost the software in the rebuild) and the same now goes for the scanner. We have the software but it won't work properly and, due to its age, HP no longer offers support of the product. So much for "HP Customer Care." What a load.

I got to bear witness to a "girls' night" tonight. Yep, I was at Katie's house and she had over all the bridesmaids to just kinda hang out and whatnot. Of course, having nothing else to do except watch TV, I sat in on a little bit of what was going on. As would be expected, they talked about the dresses, some hints on the bachelorette party and just a bunch of other stuff regarding... well... women. Not that I was bored or anything, but I needed some male company after a while, so I watched some TV with Katie's brother Steve. He left, so I was stuck channel surfing and came across An American Werewolf in London dubbed into Spanish on Telmundo. I love watching badly dubbed movies from time to time... they crack me up. Oh, yeah, the wedding party (ed. note - page has since been removed from the site) page finally has more information on it about Laura now (still no picture yet), but you can get a better idea of who she is.

Apparently, yesterday was a bad day for the entertainment industry. Carroll O'Connor, best known as Archie Bunker in "All in the Family", died of a heart attack at age 76. And we also lost legendary blues guitarist John Lee Hooker who was 83 years old. Man, I opened up my copy of the Chicago Tribune this morning to find tributes to the both of them. I was afraid to open the paper any further for fear I would find several more people had died (without looking at the obituaries page). Kinduva depressing morning.

Okay, many of you may know that there is still talk about a third installment in the Terminator series of movies. Well, there has been some action to back up the talking. The third movie is supposed to start filming later this year and is tentatively known as Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines. The star of this one is supposed to be Edward Furlong who is returning as John Connor. Schwarzenegger has also signed on to return. This doesn't necessarily make for a great movie considering the bombs that Schwarzy has been involved in as of late and, well, it's Eddie Furlong (need I say more?). Many of you probably don't know that I absolutely hated the second T flick even though I stand by the first installment as one of the finest sci-fi/action flicks ever made. I thought the second one was just way too corny... I hated Schwarzenegger as a good guy (or, that is, how the script portrayed him as a babysitting android)... I hated Furlong's character... I wasn't too big a fan of the bulked-up Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton)... I hated how big Director James Cameron's ego was getting. Lots of 'hates'... sorry. On the plus side, I did enjoy Robert Patrick as the T-1000 - very convincing acting on his part. But, this next one has a lot going for it already. Get this. There is a (good?) female android played by Famke Janssen (Jean Grey in X-Men) and an evil android played by Vin Diesel (The Fast and the Furious and Saving Private Ryan). No Linda Hamilton this time around. Also, no James Cameron either. In talks to direct this movie is Jonathan Mostow (U-571 - of which I am a fan). I dunno... this one may turn out pretty okay. There are already talks of a fourth movie. For more info, check out the T3 page at Upcomingmovies.com.

Update: When I say "update" I feel like an episode of "Unsolved Mysteries." Don't ask me why. Well, anyway, Entertainment Weekly magazine has announced that David Hasselhoff will be bringing "Knight Rider" back to TV. Yess!! I don't mean that he's bringing the original show back in reruns. No, no. He's starting a whole new series in which he will be the mentor (still Michael Knight, of course) and oversee two younger actors who get to ride around in Kitt. And, oh yes, William Daniels will be returning as the voice of Kitt. The show would not be complete without his voice. Daniels is currently serving as the president of the Screen Actors Guild and also starred as Mr. Feeny in "Boy Meets World" in the mid 90s. Busy guy. Thanks for making the time to be a part of me reliving my youth. Yes, Michael... we're back.

Okay, many of you may know that there is still talk about a third installment in the Terminator series of movies. Well, there has been some action to back up the talking. The third movie is supposed to start filming later this year and is tentatively known as Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines. The star of this one is supposed to be Edward Furlong who is returning as John Connor. Schwarzenegger has also signed on to return. This doesn't necessarily make for a great movie considering the bombs that Schwarzy has been involved in as of late and, well, it's Eddie Furlong (need I say more?). Many of you probably don't know that I absolutely hated the second T flick even though I stand by the first installment as one of the finest sci-fi/action flicks ever made. I thought the second one was just way too corny... I hated Schwarzenegger as a good guy (or, that is, how the script portrayed him as a babysitting android)... I hated Furlong's character... I wasn't too big a fan of the bulked-up Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton)... I hated how big Director James Cameron's ego was getting. Lots of 'hates'... sorry. On the plus side, I did enjoy Robert Patrick as the T-1000 - very convincing acting on his part. But, this next one has a lot going for it already. Get this. There is a (good?) female android played by Famke Janssen (Jean Grey in X-Men) and an evil android played by Vin Diesel (The Fast and the Furious and Saving Private Ryan). No Linda Hamilton this time around. Also, no James Cameron either. In talks to direct this movie is Jonathan Mostow (U-571 - of which I am a fan). I dunno... this one may turn out pretty okay. There are already talks of a fourth movie. For more info, check out the T3 page at Upcomingmovies.com.

That's gotta hurt. Motorist Paul Schloneger, after playing a game of cat and mouse in Hollywood, Florida with fellow motorist Chris Pape (BMW vs. SUV-style), got so pissed off that he slashed at Pape's neck with a machete. Yeah, now that's road rage. Pape didn't die... he's on bed rest with several stitches in his neck.

But even if he did die, he could sure go in style. At a music marketing festival at the Jacob Javits Center in NYC, Gene Simmons of the band KISS introduced the new KISS coffin. Yep, you heard me right. It's a big, black coffin with the KISS logo emblazoned on it and a crowd shot of a concert as well as the faces of the four original members in Destroyer-era makeup. I know that there are some fans out there who might want this, but can you imagine attending a wake (visitation, etc.) and seeing someone's body lying in a KISS coffin? Creepy. Even if you're not planning on dying anytime soon, you can still purchase one of these coffins and use it as a beer cooler. Yep, the model that Simmons was showing off was filled with ice and cold beverages. I'm really not sure which is creepier - KISS coffin used as an actual coffin or KISS coffin used as a beverage cooler. Ick.

Here's something you don't read about every day. Apparently a group out of Los Angeles known as Valley VOTE (Voters Organized Toward Empowerment) is pushing for a referendum to be added to the November 2002 ballot that would allow for the city of Los Angeles to split into two different cities - Los Angeles and Valley City. How's that for different? As it stands, L.A. has a population of 3.7 million people and is the second largest city in the U.S. behind NYC and followed by Sweet Home Chicago. A study has recently been carried out which has determined that splitting the city would create serious financial damage to what would be both cities. However, Valley VOTE and its chairman Richard Close contend that the L.A. city government does not serve the interests of the more suburban areas of L.A. and they feel they are treated like L.A.'s "step child" (yes, the quotes are necessary). Should the split happen, though, the suburban area, currently known as the San Fernando Valley, would not be entitled to water rights from L.A. which currently provides their water. This could get interesting. By the way, here's a map of how the city is currently laid out if you're interested. Doesn't this sound eerily similar to Quebec's repeated (and failed) attempts to secede from Canada and create its own country?

Wow. I still have trouble believing that she has been putting up with me and my crap for as long as she has been. Today officially marks the 2 1/2 year anniversary for Katie and me. Wow. Happy Anniversary, hon. I love you. Hey, so this isn't worldly news. It's worldly in my books. Deal with it. This is my website and I can use it to say whatever the hell I want to say. Ha!

I can't decide if this belongs in the "Darwinism Missed Me" file or if I should create a new file called "Dipshits 'R' Us". I'll let you decide after you read this. As most of you know, Sony Pictures Entertainment came under fire last week after it was discovered that they "created" a movie reviewer to give rave reviews of the movies The Animal and A Knight's Tale. The purpose of this technique was so they would have some positive reviews of the movies for print advertisements. Not that they were needed since both flicks did get pretty good critical praise, however Sony created David Manning of the Ridgefield (CT) Press anyway. Now, another revelation has been made by Sony. Apparently, when The Patriot was released, they advertised using man-on-the-street testimonials from people who had just seen the movie. What Sony didn't tell us was that two of these people were Sony employees. Kinda detracts from the seeming "willingness" of the regular man to offer his opinion. So, which heading does this wonderful tale of cinematic woe get filed under?

You wanna know who I feel sorry for the most in all this brouhaha? Heath Ledger. So far, two of his films have been at the center of these controversies. I can understand that Rob Schneider's The Animal may be perceived as needing a little help with how this sort of comedy has been bombing lately at the box office (ref. Little Nicky, Saving Silverman, Tomcats, etc., etc., ad infinitum). However, The Animal is doing pretty well and many of the reviewers out there have said it's pretty okay in it's own right. Yet, it's gotta make Heath feel good to know that Sony has such high faith in his films. To Sony: give Heath a chance to earn these reviews on his own. He's a good actor, he can do it. Stop trying to help him. I saw both of the flicks in question and I liked them and I wanna see The Animal as well... it looks good. And none of these opinions come as a result of bogus reviewers.

Whadda bunch o' goofballs, those Jaguar makers. Sheesh. Apparently makers of the Jaguar line of luxury cars have a habit of leaving their personal signature on the cars they produce. Typically, they leave some kind of message on the back of the seat panel that would only be discovered if the car is in an accident and the seat is torn apart, etc. Well, they also left their mark on Queen Elizabeth's new Jag and said message has ruffled a few feathers. They drew a swastika on the back of one of the seats and left pornographic materials inside door panels. Ha ha, they thought. Until, that is, agents for the Queen took the car apart to bomb proof it and found their cute little messages. A worker at the plant that made the car has resigned over the incident. Fudge around with the Queenie and you is bound to get stung. Damn that smarts.

I'm sure that everyone's heard about D.C.'s own little hellraisers, President W's twin daughters Jenna and Barbara, right? If you haven't, the pair got busted at a bar in Texas for trying to drink underage. Kinda stupid if you ask me. How can they expect to get away with it considering how well known you would expect them to be? That combined with the well-dressed Secret Service "dates" they have in tow. Well, anyway, 100.3 FM The Bear in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada has offered the girls the chance to come up to Edmonton and drink legally. Afternoon drive time DJs Matt Mauler and Jake Daniels (no, not Jack) made the offer for the twins to fly up and take part in a thoroughly mapped out pub crawl and spend the night in the presidential suite at an unnamed hotel. All the cost would be picked up by the radio station... except if their Secret Service agents decide to come along; they have to pay their own way. The offer will stand for the 531 days until the girls turn 21 and the station has even informed both the White House and Austin, Texas media outlets about the offer. That's pretty damned cool if you ask me.

Well, he's dead. If you really need to ask about whom I'm speaking, then you must have been in a cave since before 1995. I'm talking about Timothy McVeigh who was executed for the bombing of the Alfred Murrah federal building in Oklahoma City in 1995 that killed 168 people. He was pronounced dead by lethal injection at 7:14 a.m. today in a federal prison in Terre Haute, Indiana. Typically, I'm a proponent of capital punishment and if there was ever a case of the use of it being warranted, this was definitely it. However, I'm kinda borderline in my support of capital punishment. The justification for use of it definitely needs to be revisited and, well, I dunno... it's just kind of a strange bird. I was watching the events leading up to his execution this morning on TV and I was feeling strange. I can't quite explain it. I still feel odd, like some injustice occurred in Terre Haute this morning. Am I becoming somewhat bleeding-heart liberal in my old age? I dunno. Maybe my feelings about capital punishment are something that need to be revisited as well. Ah, me on my own oddity odyssey.

Have you been following the trailers for A.I.: Artificial Intelligence lately? It's the new sci-fi flick from Steven Spielberg (supposed to be a Stanley Kubrick film, but for obvious reasons, like he's dead, Spielberg took over the pet project) starring Haley Joel Osment of The Sixth Sense as an android boy who is given the ability to feel emotions. Well, the film sounded great when I first heard about it and the first teaser trailer looked incredible. But, lately, the trailers have just gotten weird. In my mind, there is such a thing as sci-fi (Gattaca) and then there is Sci-Fi (The Fifth Element), note the capital S and F. Now, I'm not so sure about this movie. I am getting some weird vibes from it.

I forgot to mention something about this past weekend. I finally got Katie to watch all of Star Wars (Episode IV... not the whole run). I'm so proud of her. She watched about a third of it with me a few months ago but we never got to finish it. So when we were flipping through channels on Sunday night, we came across the scene where C-3PO and R2-D2 blast off in the escape pod. I told her to keep it there since she obviously didn't realize what we were watching. When she finally figured it out, she put up a fight as would be expected, but I convinced her to keep it on. She sat there and watched the whole thing. She didn't fall asleep... didn't try to change the channel... didn't leave the room. She even finished watching it after I had left to go home. Yes, I can tell she finished it. I know when she lies. She's as good at lying as I am (translation: she's terrible at it). She even said it wasn't as bad as she thought it would be; a little corny, but what blockbuster flick (or any flick, for that matter) from the 70s isn't a bit corny? Kate, I'm proud of you girl. Next stop... The Empire Strikes Back.

I dunno if I've told you guys about the desk calendar that I have. It's one of those day-by-day calendars for The Onion which is a parody newspaper out of Madison, WI. The little blurb on it today is great. It's all about Ted Nugent and his new cologne called "Heartland." Well, the article "quotes" Nugent as saying "We tested that sumbitch on ferrets, weasels, deer, elk, squirrels, bison, trout, crickets, gibbons, iguanas, donkeys, capybaras, koalas, hyenas, penguins, woodpeckers -- every goddamn animal we could find... and, just to be extra-certain it was safe for consumer use, we injected it into a kitten's bloodstream, sprayed it on otters with open wounds that we inflicted, and forced cows to drink it through their nose. We also squirted it in a duck's eyes. Then we ran out of cologne and just started punching the duck." If you know anything about Nugent and his outdoorsman ways, then you'll find this hilarious as all hell. I did. One question though... what the hell is a capybara?

Okay, just forget about everything I said yesterday. Apparently, all movie studios right now are on a major video release bonanza. Everything that Katie and I have been to see that is still in the top 10 has had a video release date announced. Pearl Harbor... Dec. 11. Shrek... Oct. 30.Along Came a Spider... Sept. 11. Bridget Jones's Diary... Sept. 18. Well, all of them, that is, except forA Knight's Tale. But, I'm sure you can expect that one to be announced pretty soon. I guess we won't have to worry about any of these movies being re-released for any Oscar consideration sometime later in the year. Weird. I really thought that, if nothing else, Shrek would be re-released for Oscar consideration. But, then again, it's hard to forget that movie. It may not need the extra boost. At this rate ($148.4M total gross), I think this film could easily be the highest earning animated flick ever. Sorry, dunno what the record holder is right now. You can bet, though, that I will be one of the first in line the day it's released on DVD. Yeah, baby. Oh, yeah, I saw it again with my brother last night. What can I say... It's worth the full-price ticket.

This is obviously a case of massive pre-marketing. Pearl Harbor has already been given a video release date. Just to give you the skinny, movies don't normally have a release date assigned until they drop out of the box office top 20 listing. Sometimes, you may see a release date for a flick that's been sitting in the bottom half of the top 20 for several months. But, you never (so far as I've seen) see a top 10 flick given a video release date. This is strange. Obviously they're marketing this for as close to the 60th anniversary of the bombing as possible (it's being released December 11, 2001). This may be great for sales of the video especially considering how much money the film has been raking in and the fact that it's still number one on the charts after two weekends (followed very closely by Shrek - $30M vs $28.5M). Wow. That's all I can say. Wow.

Katie and I saw one of the funniest movies that I have ever seen in my life yesterday. Shrek is by far one of the most creative and technologically superior animated flicks ever made. Of course, with each passing computer animated movie, it is expected that the technology will improve, but this was just awe inspiring. Princess Fiona moved like a human would. At times, I thought I was watching a real movie until I saw Shrek or heard Eddie Murphy jabbering away as Donkey. It was cool how you could, at times, forget you were watching a cartoon. And the humor. Oh, the humor. Cartoons have started to go raunch. I don't mean "Beavis & Butthead" or "South Park" raunch. Classy stuff... fart jokes... the word "ass"... the Gingerbread Man yelling "Eat Me!" That sort of still-relatively-innocent raunch. These are not your kids' animated movies anymore, folks. Yesssss.

Well, I went into my movie site and had some fun. I made a few cosmetic changes to the overall look of the site. Added a background instead of that drab khaki color (still drab and khaki, but now with ultra, super duper sandflecks! Woo hoo!). Broke some pages apart so the files weren't so large. Tabled it to a smaller width so the text doesn't bleed out as far at the edges. And I also got rid of a bunch of the stupid little graphics that were on the pages like the e-mail logo and that bomb that was used as a divider. I think I like it better. It'll take a little while to sink in.