Friday, 7 March 2003: I just received an e-mail from a coworker which inspired me to throw together another installment of "Photoshopolitics." Hold on to your drawers, kiddies.

This is just a beautiful piece of Photoshop magic spoofing the James Bond flick The World is Not Enough. I am in awe of the creator of this poster. I also love how they've photoshopped Condoleeza Rice onto Denise Richards body. That cracks me up.

To keep my storage space optimized and your load time brief, I had to minimize the size of this image. But if you're curious what the text at the bottom reads, fear not, I have duplicated it below. Here ya go...

"The Bush Administration in association with
The Other Bush Administration presents
Gulf Wars Episode II: Clone of the Attack
Starring George W. Bush, Condoleeza Rice, Donald Rumsfeld
Reprising their roles from Episode I
Dick Cheney, Saddam Hussein, Colin Powell
and introducing Osama Bin Laden as the Phantom Menace
Based on an idea by George Bush, Sr.
Production designed to distract you from the failing economy.
Produced by the military industrial complex in association with Exxon, Texaco, Mobil, et al.
Directed by a desire to win the November elections.
The success of this military action has not yet been rated."

Now that's what I call creativity.

Thursday, 6 March 2003: No, I'm not going to write any commentary about Dubya's press conference today. I could honestly care less about it. We're going to war whether we want to or not and whether we need to or not and there's nothing I can say here to stop it. So why is that not stopping me from boarding my soapbox? Dunno. Here goes...

I would just like to say, though, that I am an American and I oppose this war. I know that a lot of citizens of other countries are condemning the U.S. because of our President's overwhelming desire to kill off our military forces in a foreign country. Please, I beg you people, do not be narrow minded enough to believe that the views of our president represent the views of everybody living within his country. They do not. I do not want to go to war. I do not believe it will solve anything. It will just be one long military offensive with many lives lost that will just enrage the citizenry of the country that we are attacking as well their sympathizers in other countries who will just continue to attack us and our supporters once the war is "complete" and "our objectives have been met." We can never wipe out terrorism or the threat of attacks against the U.S. It's just a thorough impossibility.

To that end, I submit to you all a letter written by former Monty Python's Flying Circus troupe member Terry Jones. Much like the letter I linked to last month from author John LeCarre, it condemns Bush for his potential actions. However, this letter employs the dry wit and ironic nature that we have come to expect from Pythoners. Check it out.

Soapbox dismounted.

Wednesday, 5 March 2003: Ah, this little break has been nice. And, judging by the sheer amount of crap I typed last month, well deserved. So, now we're off again...

I'd like to wish a big old Happy Birthday to the potato chip. Yes, the original potato chip was accidentally created 150 years ago this year. Not sure about the exact date, but who really cares? Okay, so this isn't Earth-shattering news, but it's pretty cool all the same. If you'd like to read the history of the potato chip, check out The Christian Science Monitor (why it's there, I have no idea), it's actually quite intriguing.

I'd also like to introduce all of you to a whole new type of hero for this day and age. She's a New Zealand woman named Mary Grierson. This woman has offered herself up to be crucified (yes, on a cross; isn't that what "crucified" implies?) by President Bush if he would agree to not go to war in the Middle East. I really don't know what would have to be going through a person's head to suddenly think, "Hey, I'll offer myself up for crucifixion if that damned blood-hungry fool will agree to not attack Iraq." It really makes you wonder, doesn't it?

So, how's that for two stories that are complete opposites on the world news spectrum?