That would probably be the most appropriate way to describe my current skin coloration.
After two consecutive days at the pool (in it, not beside it) with two visits today alone, as well as going on a 2.8 mile walk this morning and just generally spending time outside, I'm beyond barbecued.
My lower arms, upper arms, shoulders, upper back, upper chest, cheeks, forehead, and ears... well, suffice it to say, they are cooked. Well done to be a bit more specific.
It's not a particularly uncomfortable experience at the moment. Just a little tightness across my back and that's really about it. For now, I'm sure. Probably get worse as time goes on.
Just give me sheared off horns and a fist of solid rock and I could pass as Hellboy. Okay, so throw in some pecs and a washboard stomach for good measure. Not everyone can look like Ron Perlman naturally. Maybe not even Ron Perlman.
But the key is, this white boy finally has some color to him. Now, if I can only get enough chemicals on my skin to make it turn into a tan before it peels so I can actually stay some decent shade for the trip home to make it all look worthwhile, I'd be happy.
Not likely, though. I've got that "just enough" bit of Irish ancestry in me to dictate that I am either white or burned. Those are really my only two options... cave dweller or crispy critter.
I wish I could be nice and browned and have skin that says "I work 40 hours a week as a snorkel instructor" instead of a milky pallor that bemoans "I sit behind two computers all day." It would be a nice touch.
And we're going to Clearwater Beach tomorrow. This should be interesting.