Falling apart at the seams...
Summons me with just one beep...

Dream on...

Dear Brain,

I think it's time we set up some ground rules about dreaming. More specifically, the occasional tendency for aspects of my real life to crossover into the dream world. You've been in violation of some very basic tenets lately, and I would like to see this behavior stop before it becomes a real problem.

For me, sleepy time visions of me in more fantastical roles is fine. You want to make me some big name Hollywood actor? Fine. A pro-level athlete? I can dig it. Some famed adventurer and globetrotter? Heck yeah. These sorts of things are fine.

I even like having parts of my real life make the cut in these dreams. Do you want to introduce Katie into my dreams? Coolness. She can be my date to the Oscars, my sideline cheerleader, or the partner who is able to get us out of some sticky international drama. I have no problems with this.

However, there are things from my real life I don't want to see in my head as I dream. I don't want to see myself living at my parents' house as an adult. Especially not in a situation where I'm being barked at to clean up shit that my brother leaves around the house (yeah, if I'm living there, so is he).

Bill paying? Save it for real life (unless there's some way to eliminate it there as well).

And I'll be damned if I ever want to dream about and see HTML and CSS code running through my head like the binary rain in The Matrix. Oh, and for the record, at least it was valid code (v4.01 on the HTML, so far as I could tell). My brain actually took note of its legitimacy. How sad is that?

But it ends now! Not just the validity of the code, but its existence in my dreams entirely! Got it?

Kevin "Desiring to Dream of Better Things" Apgar

Comments

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g-man

Welcome to the collective. Take the blue pill.

diane

I'll never forget the night I dreamt about washing the dishes. I woke up and thought I would cry.

sizzle

when i first read this i thought it said, "dear brian" because i've only been awake a few minutes. i thought, who is brian?

i need more sleep.

kim

We have biennial audits, and when they are coming up I dream about my to do list and administrative code. It's a bit like watching the local school board meetings.

kilax

When you dream about work, you know it is time for a break! :)

ajooja

Oooooooooo, you just reminded me that I have a weird story to tell about a dream. I don't know if I'll write it today or not (kind of pissed about something else) but I might do it tomorrow.

kapgar

g-man, but I don't want the blue pill!!!

diane, I would too. What a waste of good dream time.

sizzle, my brother is Brian and he's had enough people mistype his name as "Brain." So maybe, unconsciously, you were sympathizing with him.

kim, administrative code? No thanks.

kilax, I hear ya!

ajooja, happy to help. Can't wait!

Foo

I too dream about code and it's frightening. After nights like that...I wish I worked in the adult industry.

tori

That is way too funny. I haven't had a dream like that in a long time..mine are always super scary things you could write movies from.

Bec

I used to dream in VBA. Thank God, it's being sidelined!

Eileen Dover

I want to know where to find the blog so I can read your brain's response...

kapgar

Foo, now those are dreams!

tori, maybe you should. Gotta be better than the tripe that passes for horror these days. ;-)

Bec, as in Visual Basic?? Gah!!

Eileen, I'd like to find that blog too!

Iron Fist

I don't know if I've ever dreamed HTML before, thankfully, but I have dreamed about overloading operators in C++ classes. Ugh.

kapgar

Iron Fist, I know it may be painful to admit this sort of thing, but I thank you for fessing up. It makes me feel so much better to know I'm not alone in my sleepcoding.

Lisa

At least you're dreaming. I honestly can't remember the last time I had a dream. Bad, bad sleep juju these days.

kapgar

No dreams at all? That's just weird.

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