Ode to Joy...
Well, more accurately, An Ode to Pat and Lisa...
It was a quiet morning, the ninth of December,
A day the state will forever remember.
The Feds pulled up and knocked on the door,
Of our governor whose jaw dropped to the floor.
Is this a prank, a joke, a really bad gag?
No sir, you're under arrest, tell your hag.
Word spread like wildfire, news crews deploy,
to cover the fourth busted gov in Illinois.
A Senate seat they claim he tried to sell,
"Golden" he called it. For free? Like hell.
Mr. Fitzgerald, our shining white knight,
Explained to the press the extent of our plight.
Seventy-six pages, the charges did span,
Read it all through? I doubt any [bleep]er can.
The crimes were varied and truly quite stunning,
Were Blago and company really that cunning?
What kind of idiot would be such a yutz,
And effectively kick his state in the nuts?
If we're lucky, Lisa Madigan will succeed,
At reclaiming the power on which Blago does feed.
If Roddie is allowed to continue his reign,
The people of Illinois will keel over in pain.
Appoint friends and family? Flush our taxes down the loo?
Or maybe just give Obama's seat to some yahoo.
The hellish possibilities cause uncomfortable laughter,
So please Patrick and Lisa, end this sad chapter!
A day the state will forever remember.
The Feds pulled up and knocked on the door,
Of our governor whose jaw dropped to the floor.
Is this a prank, a joke, a really bad gag?
No sir, you're under arrest, tell your hag.
Word spread like wildfire, news crews deploy,
to cover the fourth busted gov in Illinois.
A Senate seat they claim he tried to sell,
"Golden" he called it. For free? Like hell.
Mr. Fitzgerald, our shining white knight,
Explained to the press the extent of our plight.
Seventy-six pages, the charges did span,
Read it all through? I doubt any [bleep]er can.
The crimes were varied and truly quite stunning,
Were Blago and company really that cunning?
What kind of idiot would be such a yutz,
And effectively kick his state in the nuts?
If we're lucky, Lisa Madigan will succeed,
At reclaiming the power on which Blago does feed.
If Roddie is allowed to continue his reign,
The people of Illinois will keel over in pain.
Appoint friends and family? Flush our taxes down the loo?
Or maybe just give Obama's seat to some yahoo.
The hellish possibilities cause uncomfortable laughter,
So please Patrick and Lisa, end this sad chapter!
I never said I was a good poet.
Hey, and if you're reading this on any site or feed that doesn't have "kapgar" in there somewhere, it's stolen! Come on over to www.kapgar.com to read the real deal!
Kevin-
That was sheer lyrical bliss! Keep up the great work!
Posted by: Jason | Friday, 12 December 2008 at 02:00 PM
"Seventy-six pages, the charges did span,
Read it all through? I doubt any [bleep]er can."
Hee hee. True. Thank God for CNN.
Posted by: Faiqa | Friday, 12 December 2008 at 03:22 PM
LoL this is great!
Posted by: *lynne* | Friday, 12 December 2008 at 09:34 PM
ok, even though i don't really understand the whole thing that's going on over there.. you're not such a bad poet. that [bleep] bit was funny!
Posted by: pocket queen | Friday, 12 December 2008 at 09:52 PM
Apparently I wasn't the only one writing poems this week.
We debated at work whether Illinois is the most corrupt state in the union or if Rhode Island still holds the title.
Posted by: Stacey | Saturday, 13 December 2008 at 10:38 AM
Nicely done if I do say so myself!
Such poetic license. :)
~ZZ
Posted by: Greeneyezz | Saturday, 13 December 2008 at 02:27 PM
Thank you kindly.
Posted by: kapgar | Sunday, 14 December 2008 at 08:02 AM
It's good to have CNN keeping us so informed, isn't it? ;-)
Posted by: kapgar | Sunday, 14 December 2008 at 08:03 AM
Thanks. It was fun to write.
Posted by: kapgar | Sunday, 14 December 2008 at 08:05 AM
And I can't believe the bleep was the last thing I added. I almost forgot to throw that in there and it's the funniest thing about this whole Blagordeal.
Posted by: kapgar | Sunday, 14 December 2008 at 08:06 AM
Rhode Island? Seriously? I need some news.
Posted by: kapgar | Sunday, 14 December 2008 at 08:06 AM
Thank you! Good to see you here!
Posted by: kapgar | Sunday, 14 December 2008 at 08:07 AM
Awesome!!
Lisa Madigan is the only Democrat I would ever vote for. She is a true bad ass.
[BTW - is there still a way to subscribe to comments or am I just completely missing it?]
Posted by: Sheila (Charm School Reject) | Monday, 15 December 2008 at 10:04 AM
Wow! That must have taken you a while.
Posted by: Krys Slovacek | Monday, 15 December 2008 at 10:05 AM
She is pretty bad ass. As for subscribing, you're right, the option is gone. I'll bet if you sign up for that account, the option is in there. I know that the e-mails I get when I'm notified of a comment have an "unsubscribe" option.
Posted by: kapgar | Monday, 15 December 2008 at 01:12 PM
Not as long as you might think. I did hit a couple stumbling blocks. But they ironed themselves out in short order. Thanks, BTW.
Posted by: kapgar | Monday, 15 December 2008 at 01:13 PM