The other night, I dove into another such film… Empire Records.

There is a difference between Empire Records and Hackers where I’m concerned, though. I do have a history with this film and it’s a sordid one.

This film came out during my undergrad years in college. I did not go see it in theaters although many of my friends did. They loved it. Swore by it. Couldn’t believe I didn’t watch it.

So when it came out on video, I watched it. And hated it.

A year or so later, I gave it another shot. And hated it.

Finally, sometime in the early to mid 00s, I tried again. And still hated it.

Theoretically, though, I should’ve loved it. It’s set in a music store, the likes of which I basically lived in throughout high school and college. It stars a bunch of young actors that I enjoyed in other movies like Ethan Embry and Renée Zellweger and Robin Tunney. It had a killer 90s soundtrack. It had Liv Tyler in that plaid, pleated skirt and fuzzy, midriff-baring sweater.

Yup. I should’ve loved it.

But I just couldn’t connect with the ridiculousness of the plot, the bad acting, the over-the-top nature of it all, the non-ending.

Yet, for some reason, I wanted to try again. I can’t explain why I did, but I did. So I did.

Honestly, it wasn’t as bad as I remember it being. For the most part, I did enjoy it. It wasn’t great by any stretch of the imagination… just enjoyable despite it still being ridiculous and unbelievable for so many reasons.

The movie opens on the premise that a record store manager (Anthony LaPaglia) who mostly hates his lot in life semi-forgives an employee (Rory Cochrane) for stealing $8K and blowing it in Atlantic City. He even goes so far as to try to help him get it back. I know this was one of the things my friends loved the most… having a manager be so close with his employees that he gives them a second chance even when it’s for a very pricey mistake. So I can forgive this one. Although now that they’re all working adults, I’d love to know if they still feel this way. Could be funny.

Then there’s the subplot about Warren the shoplifter who, after being dragged away by the cops, comes back to the store and shoots it up with a pistol loaded with blanks and holds the employees and several customers temporarily hostage. The cops later say they have nothing to hold him on because of the blanks but take him away for processing anyway.

Even in a pre-9/11 world when this movie was released, that’s bullshit. Assault, false imprisonment, underage possession of a firearm without a permit. Am I missing anything? Never mind that blanks can still kill a person. Post-9/11, he’d be branded a domestic terrorist and thrown in prison without a trial.

Also, what adult owner of a firearm owns blank rounds? Unless you’re a Hollywood prop master, you’d have no need at all.

Lastly, what kid Warren’s age knows the difference between full loads and blanks? 

These are the things I think about. Sue me.