Weezed
When you’re a Weezer fan and come across the headline “Wife of Weezer Bassist Scott Shriner Shot By Police, Charged With Attempted Murder,” of course you have to read it.
I can’t help my feelings. This news makes me go out of my mind.*
And then you come up with your own theories about what might have happened.
I personally think Jillian Lauren was confused. She was in Eagle Rock, a neighborhood in Los Angeles. But Beverly Hills… that’s where she wanted to be.**
I also believe that when the police told her to drop her gun, she thought they were playing and having fun and it made her feel so fine she couldn’t control her brain.***
Fine, I’ll stop.
* adapted from lyrics to Weezer’s “Hash Pipe”
** adapted from lyrics to Weezer’s “Beverly Hills”
*** adapted from lyrics to Weezer’s “Island in the Sun”
I will give most of the news outlets a plus on this story where they also used her real name, even if most also included who her husband is.
Posted by: Marty Mankins | Tuesday, 22 April 2025 at 10:08 PM
Yeah they really did, didn’t they?
Posted by: kapgar | Wednesday, 23 April 2025 at 08:39 PM